What to Do After an Adult Autism Diagnosis

Your feelings are allowed to be mixed

People react to a diagnosis in very different ways. Some feel relief, as if a long-standing puzzle finally has a name. Some feel grief for the years they spent struggling without knowing why, or frustration that no one noticed sooner. Many feel several of these at once, and the feelings can shift over weeks and months.

None of this means the diagnosis was right or wrong, or that you are reacting badly. It is a big piece of information about yourself. Autism is a lifelong difference in how the brain develops, and learning that you are autistic does not change who you were yesterday. It may change how you understand yourself.

Give yourself time before making big decisions based on it. Rest, write things down if that helps, and talk with people you trust when you are ready.

Making sense of your past

The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) says that getting a correct diagnosis of autism as an adult can help people understand past challenges, identify personal strengths and find the right kind of help. Many adults find themselves rereading old memories in a new light: a hard time at school, friendships that felt confusing, or a lifelong need for routine or quiet.

Your written report can be a useful guide here. Read it more than once, and note any parts you want explained. It may describe strengths as well as challenges, and those strengths deserve as much attention as anything else.

NIMH also suggests keeping copies of health care reports and evaluations, since they may help people with autism qualify for special programs. Store your report somewhere safe and easy to find.

Deciding who to tell

You do not owe anyone your diagnosis. Some people tell everyone close to them, some tell only a partner or one friend, and some wait a long time. All of these are reasonable.

• Start with someone who is likely to listen well, rather than the person whose reaction worries you most.
• Decide what you want to share: the word itself, what it means for you day to day, or simply what helps you.
• Expect some questions or outdated ideas. You can share what you have learned, or say you are still learning yourself.
• Remember that telling someone is not a one-time event. You can add more later, or keep some things private.

Asking for changes at work

Small adjustments at work, such as written instructions, a quieter desk, notice before schedule changes or a different way of running meetings, can make a real difference for some people. You do not have to tell your employer about a diagnosis, but if you want a change at work for a reason related to it, it can help to know the general rules.

The Americans with Disabilities Act covers employers with 15 or more employees, according to ADA.gov, and protects people who have a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activities. The U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) explains that to ask for an accommodation, a person needs to let the employer know they need a change at work for a reason related to a medical condition. You may use plain English and do not need to mention the ADA or the phrase "reasonable accommodation."

The EEOC also says that when a disability or the need for a change is not obvious, an employer may ask for reasonable documentation, limited to what is needed to show the disability and the need for the accommodation. Requests do not have to be in writing, though the EEOC notes you may find it useful to keep a record of when you asked. This is general information, not legal advice; for your situation, speak with your HR team or an employment attorney.

Community, support and your mental health

Meeting other autistic adults can be a welcome part of life after a diagnosis. NIMH suggests finding an autism support group, noting that sharing information and experiences can help people learn about options and programs. Online communities, local groups and community centers are all places to look.

It is also worth paying attention to your mental health. MedlinePlus notes that adults with autism often have other conditions such as anxiety, depression or ADHD. Some adults reach a diagnosis after a long stretch of feeling worn out from trying to keep up with expectations that never quite fit. The CDC describes psychological approaches, such as cognitive behavioral therapy, that can help autistic people cope with anxiety, depression and other mental health concerns.

And if the evaluation found something else, or did not find autism, that is still useful information. NIMH explains that in adults, some autism signs can overlap with conditions such as anxiety or ADHD. Ask the evaluator to walk you through what the findings do explain, and what next steps they suggest.

How we can help

Therapists on our team offer anxiety therapy and depression therapy by secure video. Therapy can be a place to make sense of a new diagnosis, work through worry or low mood, and plan the conversations and changes that matter to you. We do not offer a separate autism therapy service.

If you have not had an evaluation yet, Locascio Wellness offers an adult autism evaluation by secure video. Evaluations are offered only to people who are physically located in Pennsylvania, West Virginia or Arizona during appointments. They are private-pay with a sliding scale available, and the first step is the short evaluation request form.

For therapy or an evaluation, you can also set up a free 15-minute consultation on our booking page. If you are in crisis, call or text 988, or call 911. Locascio Wellness does not provide emergency services.